Sadness in the evening December 09, 2005

Death is not the greatest loss in life... The greatest loss is what dies inside us...while we live.

 

I read this a few years ago in a friend's profile whom I unfortunately soon lost. But that sentence stayed in my mind and made me think about him many times through my sad days.

 

I have been trying to share just happy thoughts with my babies, because they don't need to know about sad things yet. But sometimes I feel guilty because it is really hard to think about something happy, even if I try hard to do that for my children. I want to say to my babies how sorry I feel to ruin their happy, snowy evening because of how I am feeling now. I want them to know it is never something that I want to do, but unfortunately all things are not under my control, so I can't give them all the good things that I wish. 

 

I am glad that my husband called and pulled me out of the deep sadness,. He is always like an angel to me. On the other hand I feel sad because I had shared my happy thoughts with a person who did not care .... I had just thought she would be happy to know about my children's happiness. I will always feel she has been among the greatest loss in my life.... 

 

I believe my babies will find out by themselves about all the dark side of life , but I don't want them to be scared. Because I still believe that there will always be a kind and caring hand tapping on their shoulders, even when they feel the loss of the great things, telling them, “Be strong, go on, I am here for you,”  and I am pretty sure it will be Love's hand. Thanks and love to my husband, love to my children and to whoever will have the supporting  hand for them!