One of My Good Moments, The Boys Telling Me A Story ! August 29, 2007

It was a very busy day for me. In the morning I took the boys to their Gymboree class and then after we came home Relic went to sleep but River did not. It is the worst thing for me to have one of them up, when I have tons of things to do and need them to give me some time. River was making a lot of noise which woke Relic up. After lunch they played a little and then River was tired and wanted to take a nap, but Relic didn't.... Then for the same reason River woke up and both wanted me to play with them .... I thought giving them a bath would be good for them. Oh my God, it is really hard to give to VERY active toddlers a bath when you are alone and nobody is there to help. But I survived .... Then they wanted something more and that's when I thought to take them to Salem Common. It was not a good idea because they both have been very interested in basketball and the basketball court which is in Salem common was full of big boys playing. But River and Relic didn't mind. They wanted to go to play with the big boys, and it was really hard for me to stop both of them running into the court. That's why I thought to take them back home. On the way back home, I thought to let them have a little fun with the beautiful garden around Derby House and that's where they got wild to see the apple trees and started picking the apples and biting them ....

I did have a very hard day and yelled at the boys many times. I do feel bad about it, because I know I wasn't enough patient with my sons. And now, when River and Relic are sleeping, the only thing that I can think about is all the beautiful moments that I had with them today which includes :

I don't know for how long but I went to our bedroom to floss my teeth after lunch. I could hear the boys making noises and scream and when I left the bedroom they both ran toward me and River started to rub his head and pretending to cry. I asked what was wrong and he ran to his brother pull a drum stick from his brother's hand and hit his head looking at his brother. And I knew that he meant Relic had hit his head with the drum stick. I looked at Relic and was going to get upset when Relic took the drum stick back ran to the metal trash can and started banging on that, looking at me like ' I didn't mean to hurt him I was just banging on the trash can' ....

I was really impressed with how they were trying to tell me their side of story. I just hugged both of them and kissed them.

A Family Night Out, August 25, 2007

What If My Children ...., August 25, 2007

Yesterday which was a hot day, I decided to take the boys to Chunk E. Cheese's to let them have a little fun in a place which they had never been to. It could be a good place for all of us to enjoy if I had somebody else with me to keep an eye on one of the boys, but Michael had to work from work and couldn't be with us.

When we were there, the boys were running around enjoying the games but it was really hard for me to see both of them in different areas at the same time and I had all the bad imaginations of the show Law & Order in my mind, thinking about my boys getting kidnapped or being abused. I got so scared that couldn't stay there longer and I decided to take the boys and leave however they didn't want it and were crying when I was buckling them in their stroller. When I was buckling Relic in his car seat River escaped from stroller and ran away. I left Relic alone in the car not being strapped and went to catch River. When we went back to the car, Relic had moved to the trunk for back seats and ere playing with the balls that they had there. River saw him and didn't let me buckle him. He wanted to go to have fun in the trunk with his brother. I was feeling weak and weak every second and it was hot in the car. I just closed the door and sat in the back seat crying and counting my boys 1,2 to be sure if they both were with me. My blood sugar was dropping low but at that time I didn't know that. I just felt that there was ssometing wrong and my boys were in danger. I tried to take the cell phone outyof my bag to call Michael and ask for help, but River who had seen me crying was feeling bad took the phone away and wanted me to hold him . By that time Relic had moved to front seat starting to horn and that's how people paid attention to us in the car. I remember two men opened the door and asked if I was okay. They called 911 and after a few minutes I was in the ambulance and my boys in fire truck or police car holding the bears that policemen gave to them. I knew that my boys were in a safe place but was worried. I needed to see them and that's when the policemen brought my babies to see me. Their hair was all wet from sweating, their faces all red because of heat and they were worried if I wasn't fine .... Michael came after a few minutes and had the boys in his arms, where I felt could be the safest place in the world for them....

We all did have a very tough day. The boys felt good after seeing me being okay. Michael was fine when he saw that he took care of everything, but going to bed I was thinking if my boys would ever trust me taking care of them ....

The Boys Are 16 Months Today!, August 21, 2007

I look are River and Relic, and I can't believe these adorable boys are mine! There are a lot of things about them which looks a little strange for me. They are not shy at all, and actually have very good self confidence. I love it but I can't believe how my sons can be like that. Michael believes that our trip to Iran where they were the head of every party has helped them to be like this.

Today I took them to Dix Park in Beverly Farm which had a nice playground, so they could play with some other children. They could climb so fast that nobody could catch them. Every slide is just a piece of cake for them. There were many children there, mostly older than my sons but River and Relic were the ones who didn't need me hold their hands or watch them. They are just like big boys and I am really proud of them. But a little scared too. They have fallen many times but they almost never want to cry because of pain. They are really strong, but kind and caring too. I love the way that they come to hug us and give us kisses.....

The boys are 16 months today and thankfully everything has gone really well with them. They are growing up fast and learning fast too. I wish them to stay so loving and strong forever

Busy Boys! August 15, 2007

River and Relic finished their kindermusik class today. I am not sure if we want to sign them in for fall or no. I need to think about the free time that we are going to have and also compare the class to others. Wow ! It is not easy ! I wonder how hard it is going to be to help them decide which college is good for them to go. But until that day ....

Here is a picture that I took yesterday, when they just woke up after their afternoon nap, starting to do all the things to make me crazy. Michael sent me message from work telling how he was missing the boys and I sent him this picture to let him know how busy his sons were

A Good Day, August 13, 2007

I guess the boys had missed their Gymboree classes a lot. Because they both were really excited about being there today. They are very good climbers and always amaze everybody in the class. Relic was doing really well about tossing the balls in the hoop and made me very proud. And River was very good at walking on a cylinder slide.

They did get tired there and couldn't stay for more than half an hour of their playgym time. Coming home they really wanted to take a nap but I insisted them to have lunch first. When I put them in their bouncer seats and gave them their bottles, thought to let them go to sleep by themselves. I know, they are old enough to do that by now, but I guess that's another thing about me spoiling them. Anyway, they did go to sleep without me

Tonight we were watching some beautiful concerts on PBS which we all enjoyed, and here is a picture of the boys and me watching the concerts

The Boys in Pool, August 11, 2007

A Great Day in Maine , August 11, 2007

We had a beautiful day in Maine. We were invited to have dinner with Michael's brother and his family and Michael's parents who had just come from Florida.

The boys had a really great day playing with their cousins Meagan and Kienan and even Aunt Jeanne. They are all very kind people and love River and Relic a lot.

River and Relic went for a little swim in their uncle's pool and were chasing their little poor dog most of the time. They even got to feed the dog too.

I had a great time as well. I enjoyed the food and watching my sons laughing and running all over their uncle's beautiful house. Jeanne has always been very kind to me and I have been missing her hugs which I could get today. I do feel lucky to have such a wonderful and caring people as my relatives

Entry for August 08, 2007

We took the boys to Garden City Pediatrics for the first time. We are not going to see the pediatrician that they had any more because we were not quiet happy with him, and a friend suggested a doctor which we wanted to see today but was on vacation. That's why we saw a substitute doctor there. She believed that all the cough and runny nose is because of ear infection and also believed that the boys have allergy and gave them medicines to treat those. It didn't seem to be very right and I didn't feel very comfortable giving the boys the medicines that she prescribed, and for the first time in my life, I wished if I would be a doctor. My niece Ghazal is a pharmacist ( a very good one ) and I called her and she made me sure that there was nothing wrong to give the boys the medicines.

River and Relic have missed all the Gymboree classes that they had this week but I am hoping that they can go to their kindermusik class tomorrow.

When I was putting them in bed I thought about how innocent they looked and wished them get well soon. They are our world and it's really hard to see them not feeling good. However nothing can stop them from running around and make me scream NO , which means they have been doing all the naughty things that they always do, and thinking about those things makes me smile when they are sleeping

Entry for August 07, 2007

It's been long that I haven't had time to write, being busy with my sons getting cold and all the busy days that they have been giving me with their active little bodies and very curiuse minds.

They haven't been eating well , neither sleeping well. I bet they have lost weight, but they are still happy. Yesterday when we went to see the therapist that we usually see about helping us handle the boys better , he told us how amazed he is to see the boys always smiling even when they are sick.

I had started to read about how to raise my"child" well from when I was not even 13, and was always interested in knowing more. We try to read every article the we find , talk with people who have good kids and ask them questions, watching videos and what ever we think can help, but still, I don't feel confident if we are doing right. Seeing people raising children is much different from when you have children yourself. My sister has two wonderful girls who are very ssuccesful in their careers and are great in everything and I had thought it was not hard to raise them being so good before having children, but now .... Oh, God ! How could my sister and her husband do such a wonderful job ?

Here is a picture of the boys in Maritime Festival in Salem, watching the music group after they have been dancing.