Last night I was thinking what if I die ? It is the time that I want to be alive more than any other time, not because of myself but because I think my babies do need me. I know how Michael loves our babies, I know my brother in law and his wife who are my babies' god parents love them and I do know that my sister and her husband adore my babies, but I can not trust any of them to raise my babies and give them as much as love that I have for them.
I was crying and asking God to take care of my innocent babies. I did have a very difficult pregnancy and I hope my God who helped my babies stay healthy through all the problems that I had, will help my babies to be raised in the arms of love....
Do not worry about dying, Bita. You are nowhere near dying, and in fact seem healthier than you were before your pregnancy. (Of course, I don't know everything) Just think about being a grandmother, some day you will be Grandma Reilly. You will be ten years younger than I am now when the boys graduate from college. You will probably be about the same age I am now when River gets the Nobel Peace Prize for his work in genetic cures for all diseases and Relic gets the Pulitzer for his insightful history of Persia. Keep a positive outlook.
ReplyDelete(((hugs)))
charlie