My smart sons! December 28, 2008

River and Relic are just 32 months and they have already started to read. They have known the alphabet from before they turned 2. They know how every letter sounds and it makes it easy for them to read the words.

Michael and I are trying to avoid being like any other parent who think that their children are very smart. But I have had 18 nieces and nephews which some of them are really smart(My niece Golrokh, who got her master degree in Polymer engineering from one of the best universities in the world, when she was only 23). But still. I believe that River and Relic are very smart. Talking with a lot of people who have been involved with children, makes me believe that I am not wrong :)

Merry Christmas! December 25, 2008

Relic and River had a Merry Christmas, so far!

They got presents from Santa, Mama & Daddy, Granpa Reilly and Mimi, Khaleh Behjat and Khaleh Badri. They even had more gifts from their cousin Golrokh which I had to hide. Because I think they have had more than enough presents for today.

Good Night to My Very Special One! December 17, 2008

Ghazal is not only my niece, she is my very favorite one. I was only 8 when she was born, but I stopped playing with dolls and started feeling like a mother to her. My sister was good enough to trust me and I was good enough to gain the trust. After a while I was babysitting Ghazal for hours alone and that's how we two got attached to each other emotionally. I remember how she came into my arms after my 2 weeks trip and how I felt good to have her back in my arms.Thanks to God, she was very easy going about everything and also very understanding. She listened very well, when I explained the reason of things to her and it made me respect her as a person even when she was just a toddler.

We grew up together and I have always been proud to have her.

She has been loving River and Relic from before they were born and it always makes my heart warm, thinking that my sons won't be alone.

Ghazal is going to get married tomorrow and I couldn't make it to be there. It just breaks my heart ... but I am trying to handle it.

She called me an hour ago to say Good Night before going to bed! Tomorrow she will be married and she needed my blessing to sleep better the last night of being single ...

Ghazal will have my blessing, not just because she is my favorite niece, but because she is her, my very special one ...

Let's be thankful for what we have! December 04, 2008

I have been having very hard days : My sons and I had a cold and also I have had a very bad shoulder pain which I don't know how it's come !

My very favorite niece, Ghazal is getting married on December 18 and I know that I won't be able to go. Thinking about not being there makes me think about the big days that my boys are going to have and something tells me what if I won't be there .... Ghazal is like a daughter to me, my only daughter and if I can't be there on her wedding day ... I know it is silly. I am not planing to die, because I have a lot of things to do before I die . Too busy to find some time for dying

Yes, I am not having very easy days but the only thing that makes me smile is thinking about my sons. Thinking about how happy, loving, healthy and smart they are. And this thought reminds me how I should be thankful for what I have.

I was looking at the website of St. Jude Children's Hospital and thought .... No, I am not brave enough to even think about it for a second. So, let's be thankful for what we have .... Let's help as little as we can, the people that wish to be in our place even for a second !

Thanksgiving, November 30, 2008

We tried to make thanksgiving dinner simple. We didn't need to tire ourselves out. When Relic and River were taking their afternoon nap, I went to look at them and almost not believing that those little angels were my sons!

I do know that I have a lot to be thankful for. But I believe the most important gifts that I have gotten in my life are my sons

Entry for November 26, 2008

I can't believe that Thanksgiving is already here I am a kind of person who wants to plan everything in advance, but a lot of things in my life have taught me that it is not always possible to plan everything in advance ! For example I had never planed to have twins but right now I think it happened for the best. Just imagining one of my boys alone, makes me sad. So, I think if you haven't planned things and they happen when you are not ready, will not be always bad ....

We are going to have a Thanksgiving dinner here in our home, just the four of us ! But we are going to try our best to make it a fun night for our sons. We believe that our sons -being American/Iranian- have a lot to enjoy.

We are almost done with our Christmas shopping. Yesterday we had our pictures taken, ready to make Christmas cards. We are going to have a little Christmas tree this year ( much bigger than the old one ). The boys are old enough to enjoy Christmas this year and it makes it really exciting for me.

Entry for November 14, 2008

Relic and River are getting involved with Thomas and friends like crazy ! They want to play "train", watch Thomas and read stories about Thomas all the time. Every time that we buy them a new engine, they get a new catalog and sit and look at the pictures very carefully. They almost know all the characters and have a new list of what they want to "buy" everyday !

Tonight, we went to eat out and after that decided to go to Toys R us to let the boys burn their energy. We had told them that we were not going to buy anything for them. But when they found the aisle of Thomas and friends, they got very excited and started to pick some of the engines that they have in their "list". Michael and I had to tell them that we were not going to buy any of those then. Knowing that made them cry. It was the first time that they were crying in a store, wanting us to buy something for them. It was not easy for us watching them crying, but we had to let them learn that they can not always get what they want

Congratulation to the world ! November 05, 2008

I still remember how disappointed I was after the presidential election in 2004 when George W. Bush won. I almost couldn't sleep the first night, not knowing if it was for real or I was having a nightmare ! Living in Massachusetts which is a very democratic state, I had thought everyone in the US would vote for John Kerry, but I was not experienced enough to know that there were a lot of slow people who had not gotten what kind of president Bush was yet. That's why for this election I tried hard to not have my hopes up for Barack Obama to win....

I have been trying to follow the debates, knowing the biography of Obama and McCain to help me know who I really want to win in this election. And now, I think Obama is going to be great ! I am really excited and know having a president like him for the US will help the world to be a better place to live in

It was so cute watching Relic and River running and shouting OBAMA everyday !

Ba-d az 1 sal! October 29, 2008

salam aghaye Aminpour-e aziz;
emrooz yek sal ast ke shoma raftein va man har rooz nabavaranehtar be jaye khalie shoma negah mikonam. har rooz ba sedaye masoome bachehayam bidar mishavam va har rooz dar ooje eshghi ke be anha daram be azemat-e bari ke bar doosh dar fekr mikonam. mitarsam darmandeh bemanam, az ohdeash barnayayam va ya ....
aghaye Aminpour-e aziz , yadetan hast ? parsal vaghti hanooz nemidanestam ke shoma raftein, vaghti ghandam be shedat pain raft, fekr mikardam ke zende nistam . mitarsidam az inke bachehayam ra tanha gozashte basham. Aghaye Aminpour az shoma mikhaham , tahte har sharayeti bachehayam ra komak konin. midanamhala ke shoma raftein, in darkhast cheghadr ahmaghane be nazar miresad. ama man midanam ke mohabate shoma cheghadr faragir ast, va shoma khoob midanid man cheghadr dar tardidha va tanhaihayam be shoma niazmandam....

Entry for October , 2008

Fall has always been my favorite season. After moving to the US and living in New England, I have seen the most colorful days of my life. I have thought there is no reason for thinking that fall is a sad season. All the beautiful and happy colors that make your heart beat faster of excitement ....

But this year, it is different for me. I still think fall is the most special season, but ... I did lose one of my best friends in my entire life last year in fall. And now, where ever he is , I want him to know that without him I do feel lonely sometimes, but I know that I am not the only one who thinks this way ....

Michael's 40th Birthday ! September 16, 2008

We tried to give Michael a happy birthday. I had thought for long what to get him, but there was not anything that he needed which we could afford to buy ( I know he needs a big house for us ) . I just made his favorite breakfast, French toasts and Spaghetti for lunch. It is not like Michael is a big eater, but he is picky and there are not many things that he likes to eat.

River and Relic were excited about the cards that they had for Daddy. They came out of their bedroom and gave the cards to Michael telling Happy Birthday, Daddy ! They were also very excited about the gift that they had for him. After I wrapped the present, was looking for a nice bow to put on the wrapped present. River didn't know what I was looking for in the closet but he had his own thoughts of decorating Daddy's present. He found an old blue bow and was trying to stick it to the present. It was so cute what he was doing that I decided to use just that bow to decorate the present.

My real gift to Michael was a date ! We had not gone out as a couple for more than 2 years ( The last time was Michael's 20th high school reunion and my brother in law Jay and his wife Jeanne took care of the boys ) I had asked a friend of ours to take care of the boys when we went out to an Italian restaurant Bella Verona which is Michael's favorite place . The boys had a great playmate , Maeve who is 3 and is great to share and play with the boys. Sarah told that Relic did not have an easy time adjusting not having us there. But when we went back after less than 2 hours, the boys were sitting at the table eating dinner with Maeve nicely. They did like what Sarah had made for them

When we came back home we had the cake and the boys were excited to blow the candles of 4 and 0 with their Daddy.

The beautiful memories of my sons' childhood, August 19, 2008

I do know there are a lot of precious moments motherhood that I won't need to remember as a memory for myself, because they will be stored in my heart and my soul. They will make me who I am. But because I may not have all the memories in word to tell to my children when they grow up, or possibly to my grandchildren , some day . Yes, My sister Behjat is right. I should try to write when ever I can.

I do believe that my sons are smart enough to be able to do what ever they want. They already know much more than other children in their age know. They love to learn and love to do new things.

River is very brave and goes to try everything and Relic wants to follow his brother in physical activities. But I believe Relic is a better child to follow directions than River is. Relic listens carefully and wants to absorb what ever you are teaching him. But River wants to experience things by himself.

Am I wrong ? August 17, 2008

Long time ago, when I was not a mother yet, I was not enough patient with children. I would be mad if they were doing something that was not a "proper" thing to do. I thought I was being strict. But I couldn't understand that a lot of things were very proper to do for little kids !

Now, being a mother of two super active and smart 28 months old boys, I understand that kids need to explore a lot of things around them. Things that are not new for us at all, can be very interesting for kids to discover. I don't remember in which book I read that toddlers are like cavemen ! Should we expect a caveman to sit at the table and eat like us ? Should we expect a caveman to just sit on the couch crossing his legs ? Or even worse, expecting toddlers to be like brainless robots and repeat- please & thank you - to us ? I think that's just being impatient to not let a child being a child or even worse, it is being lazy to not want to sit and talk with a child to help him understand why we don't like what he is doing. We should give more respect to our children and do more than what we do for our pets ! Am I really wrong ?

I really don't feel comfortable to go to places that don't have enough respect for my children and act towards them like they are just puppies which need to learn! I am really going to rethink about where I should take my children. I know it is not a very easy decision to make but it really hurts me to see how some people are narrow minded about who a child is !

Entry for August 11, 2008

Relic had his last visit with his Early Intervention teacher, Allison today. The boys have learned a lot during the six months of visiting Allison one hour each week. Allison is a very caring and kind person who loves children. It is kind of sad, thinking that the boys won't have her as much. Of course they are still going for Early Intervention playgroups and can see Allison occasionally there, but still ....

River had his last visit last week. They both are doing amazingly well. They surprise me everyday with all the things that they know. Allison is right : River and Relic are sponges. They learn very fast and are growing up fast too. I was looking at their feet some time ago and thinking that those feet don't look like babies' feet any more. I look at their baby pictures and it feels like it was just yesterday !

I do enjoy having them every single minute as age as they are. I want them to grow up and I do want them to enjoy every moment of their childhood.

What a great week in summer :) July 14, 2008

We have been having a lot of fun this summer. Last week, the boys had a great time in their early intervention play group. It was a hot day and they went for water playing, in a little pool and playing with the sprinkler which their teacher Sarah had been setting up for them. A day after that which was also a hot day, I took them to Deverox beach in Marblehead. A day after that we went to Ipswich River Park and the boys had tons of fun with pony ride, music and dancing. A day after that we went for twins play group wich was hosted generously by Janna and the boys had a lot of fun playing with older twins. ( The picture was taken there )

On the weekend the boys' Nana and grandpa Jack came to visit and yesterday we went to Forest River Park for the first anniversary of Parents United in Salem Organization and the boys had a lot of fun for hours, there .

I am sure the boys are looking forward to have more fun these days and I will try my best to help them enjoy their childhood. Because I do know how these days flies by. My niece Golrokh who was born just yesterday ( that's how I feel ) turned 26 today She is a wonderful and smart girl and I am really proud of her. Happy Birthday to my little niece Golrokh

River on 4th of July , July 05, 2008

River picked the red B ( a symbol for Boston Baseball team ) for his face himself. He was sitting very still and did surprise the painter lady with how patient he was sitting on his Daddy's lap for the B to be painted on his face.

Relic in 4th of July, July 05, 2008

Relic was very anxius for having the painting on his face. He did pick the flag for his face and was really happy with it

A Happy 4th of July :) July 05, 2008

Entry for July 03, 2008

These days, I am having a tough time telling NO to my sons. It is not like I have decided to not spoil them any more. Because I don't believe if I have been spoiling them. I believe that they are very smart boys who want to discover everything around them, but they also are very caring boys. They do a very good job sharing their toys with other children when we go to playgrounds and also, when they see that I am not happy with they have been doing, they stop doing it, come and want to give me a hug. But they just need to stop and think what the situation is and if their mother is happy with what that they are doing. And this, doesn't happen often .... It is just because they are very smart and active 2 year old boys. We have to understand that!

They do know all the lower case and upper case English alphabet, they can count to 14 and sometimes more and recognize them. They know 11 colors : red, green, blue, yellow, orange, black, white, brown, pink, purple and gray . But because they are smart, we should not expect them to act like adults. They are just 26 months ! We should give them right to climb up the furniture, jump and many other things that adults don't do. Maybe I couldn't understand this when I didn't have children, but now I know how different children's world can be. And I believe it is more different than ours especially if they are smart and active children.

I don't know... Sometimes I think like maybe I am spoiling my sons to let them do a lot of things and feel really bad when others want to stop them ( especially if it makes my sons feel embarrassed ) But I believe my there is always a good way to stop my sons from doing things that we don't want them to do. It is not like I think my sons can go and do what ever they want, but I really feel bad if adults stop my sons not caring about how these little guys are going to feel.

When 3 months ago we were going to see my sister and her husband in Texas for 10 days, I was worried ... Knowing how neat and clean my sister is ( Oh! she used to be hypersensitive about cleaning everything ) I was worried if she would feel bad about my sons touching or possibly breaking the new things in her new house and that's why I had wanted to talk with her before we bought the ticket. We saw how patient and kind her husband and her were to my children during our long visit.

I know there are things that I need to change about my children. Because they are growing up. I am trying to do that. I have already started to put them in bed, without me lying down with them. I just sit on a glider in their bedroom, caressing their little feet sometimes. Today I started to take away their blankets during the day. They are very attached to their blankets was really hard for them. But I tried to make them busy with books and games. They do handle changes very well and I am really proud of them.

Entry for June 24, 2008

What a crazy month! When I look back , I feel like I am doing nothing but I am busy every single hour!

Last month we had the 50th anniversary of our North Shore Mothers of Multiples club and it was really nice. I got to meet the founder of the club. I did have a wonderful time with other mothers but couldn't stay long at the party. I did miss my family and needed to come back home to put my sons in bed.

Last weekend, we went to Maine to be in Kyle's graduation party. We stayed at their place over night and went to see some friends of Michael the morning after.

I think there were much more that we did last month, but I am too tired to think of them right now.

Entry for May 30, 2008

In the last weeks, it has been many times that I have needed to sit and write, but when ever I get a little time for writing, I find another thing which needs to be done .... Sometimes I feel like I am just turning around myself, doing nothing, learning nothing ....

Yes, I haven't worked as a structural engineer for more than three years. And being away from the career that I love makes me feel useless sometimes. I do get tired sometimes, very tired. Especially if I am sick, it is really hard to deal with my very active, hungry for learning sons. I am trying my best to do what ever I can for my sons, but still ....

Lat week, when the boys just started to wake up after their nap, it started to rain very hard and I remembered that I had left the car's windows open ! Michael is very sensitive about his car's seats not getting wet sometimes.(Considering how the gas price is going up, it is wise to use his car and not mine because Michael's car is hybrid ) So I had to run to close the windows fast. I just took the key and left the house not closing the door's house behind me. I had parked the car cross street and when I was running there, I heard Relic crying and following me, bare feet in the street, in the rain. I just ran back to hold him and take with me to the car. When I closed the car windows, holding Relic in my arms, just heard River crying and running to us bare feet. I was just lucky to get him before he ran into street which was more dangerous with the heavy rain and the cars going fast. Three of us were all wet, and the boys were holding me tightly coming back home. River wasn't feeling good emotionally the rest of the day. He wanted me to hold him and kiss him all the time. I am just hoping the this memory is not going to turn to a nightmare for my sons for the rest of their lives.

Yes, it is really hard to raise two very active boys at the same time. But it is worth it. I do have the most beautiful moments as a mother of twins.

Just a few days ago, Michael and I were sitting in the kitchen having some snack with each other. Relic was running back and forth the long side of kitchen and laughing. River was in the living room then playing with some toys and couldn't see what was making his brother so happy. He could hear him laughing so came to the kitchen to see what was going on. Relic ran to his brother, telling him something just in few syllables and just by that, River knew what to do. He started to run with his brother and laughing.

We went to Richardson's' farm on memorial day , getting some ice cream and we thought to let the boys go for golf there. They both were very good for just being two years old. Learned a lot and enjoyed it. They also enjoyed watching the cows....

Entry for May 09, 2008

Yes ! Relic and River are big boys now ! They sit at table to eat with us and they really like it, so do we. And also, they are not coming to our bed in the middle of night any more.

God knows how hard it was for me to close their bedroom door and let them cry when they wanted to come to cuddle with me in the middle of night. I do know, I am the one who needs them more than they need me. They have learned to be in their bed, but I still wake up in the middle of night missing their warm innocent bodies. Sometimes I go to watch them, sometimes I even go to kiss their foreheads when they are sleeping ....

Yes, they are growing up faster than I expect not asking if I am ready....

Entry for May 05, 2008

aghaye Aminpour aziz, salam

delam baraye hameye letafate roohetoon tang shode. delam baraye roozai ke ba hosele mineshastin va be hameye harfa va dard e delaye man goosh mikardin tang shode. vaghti fekr mikonam ke dige kasi ro nadaram ke ba etemade kamel azash komak bekham az ghose mikham beterekam. aghaye Aminpour, in rooza az hamishe bishtar be shoma niaz daram. bozorg kardane bacheham pichidast, gahi khaste misham va kheyli vaghta be bon bast miresam. mikham ba shoma va faghat shoma harf bezanam. shoma tanha kasi hastin ke man mitoonam ba aramesh hameye do deliham ro dar mioon bezaram. bazi rooza ehsas mikonam dige taghat nadaram. fekr mikonam daram divoone misham. mikham bahatoon harf bezanam. yadame ye bar behetoon goftam delam misooze ke Salman Harati zende nist ke sheraye taze bege va shoma goftin khob to az ghole Salman begoo. emrooz fekr mikardam age shoma boodin mikhastin man hesam ro benevisam va man fekr kardam benevisam ke cheghadr delam baratoon tang shode. benevisam va beporsam chera ma ro tanha gozashtin ? aghaye aminpour ? mikham bahatoon harf bezanam ....

Entry for April 21, 2008

River and Relic turned TWO !

The last two years have been the most challenging but amazing years of my life. I am always thankful to be the mother of these two wonderful boys

Their birthday party went great. We all had a great time and the boys really enjoyed the company of their friends

Entry for April 13, 2008

We are planning a big birthday party for Relic and River. They are going to turn 2 next week. Almost 30 of their friends with their parents are coming to the party so we are going to have almost 70 guests. Yes, I know. For being two , 30 friends is too much, but Relic and River are really popular and have a lot of friends.

It is really exciting to plan the party. I hope it is going to be a joyful party for everyone

Entry for April 11, 2008

Today is Michael's last day of work in TechTarget. We both have been confused about how we feel about him leaving this job and going to work in another place. Thankfully Michael is leaving TechTarget for a better opportunity, but still it is kind of sad. I do remember the day that he got a phone call about him going to start the job there. I remember how we were excited about it. That night, we had a little celebration making a big dinner. We didn't have the boys then so we did have time to eat like people

Michael has worked almost three years for TechTarget and has had very special days there. He had a very caring boss which was good enough to understand how Michael cared about his job and if he had problems taking care of his pregnant wife and after that his sons, sometimes.

Michael is very smart and loves his job as a computer engineer and always looks for a more challenging situation so I know he might want to leave the jobs but as I told him last night, we will always remember the days that he worked in TechTarget because those days were the very special days of our life together

Entry for April 06, 2008

Sometimes I feel like I am living in my own world, not caring what is out there and after that I feel guilty. You know ? At a time, I couldn't enjoy anything for myself just because I thought it was silly to enjoy little things, it would be selfish to be happy if there was anybody sad out there. Now I think I was sick at that time and I know it wasn't my fault to feel like that. I had been raised during war and had seen people die and of course the theme of country was the angel of death ! Yes, I remember that wearing gray socks was forbidden at school because gray was kind of white and white could attract men So, we had to wear just navy, dark brown and black ! And that's another reason for me to hate dark colors now ... Anyway, we were forced to not think of anything happy or exciting. At that time, I thought to never have a child, because I thought it wouldn't be fair to have a child if there was a child out there who didn't have anybody as family.....

But now, I think if I can't do anything to change the world, why do I have to ruin my own world ? I enjoy my sons' happiness. I laugh with them when they laugh and feel like the luckiest woman in the world when I go for a little walk with my husband holding our sons' little hands. This is my world now, simple but beautiful and I am not going to exchange it with anything else.

Entry for March 31, 2008

It's been so long after that last time that I had a little time to write. Not because I haven't had anything exciting and special in my life to write about but because I have been busier than other days.

We had a wonderful trip to Texas, visiting my sister and her husband. We all had a great time there, but River and Relic enjoyed it the most. My sister, Badri loves children and her husband is a very patient and kind man. River and Relic had a lot of fun playing with their aunt and listening to their uncle ready books to them.

We started our new Iranian year with my sister and her husband in Humble, TX. Last year we started our new Iranian year at my mother's with her and my other sister's familyin Tehran, Iran. I do feel lucky that my children are loved very much and are always surrounded by love and care. There is nothing better than this for a mother to feel. I know that my children appreciate the love and care that they feel and it makes me feel really good, because I don't want them to think that they are loved just because they deserve it. I want them to care , respect and appreciate what ever they get. I am their mother and seeing them happy makes me happy, so I don't need them to be thankful for what I do for them . But I think when you learn to be thankful you will enjoy and see what you are given better.

Entry for March 16, 2008

Being a Mother, February 17, 2008

A friend of mine sent me this story which really touched me and I thought to share it :

We are sitting at lunch one day when my daughter casually mentions that she and her husband are thinking of "starting a family."

"We're taking a survey," she says half-joking. "Do you think I should have a baby?"

"It will change your life," I say, carefully keeping my tone neutral.

"I know," she says, "no more sleeping in on weekends, no more spontaneous vacations." But that is not what I meant at all. I look at my daughter, trying to decide what to tell her. I want her to know what she will never learn in childbirth classes. I want to tell her that the physical wounds of child bearing will heal, but becoming a mother will leave her with an emotional wound so raw that she will forever be vulnerable.

I consider warning her that she will never again read a newspaper without asking, "What if that had been MY child?" That every plane crash, every house fire will haunt her. That when she sees pictures of starving children, she will wonder if anything could be worse than watching your child die.

I look at her carefully manicured nails and stylish suit and think that no matter how sophisticated she is, becoming a mother will reduce her to the primitive level of a bear protecting her cub. That an urgent call of "Mom!" will cause her to drop a soufflé or her best crystal without a moment's hesitation.

I feel that I should warn her that no matter how many years she has invested in her career, she will be professionally derailed by motherhood. She might arrange for childcare, but one day she will be going into an impoortantbusiness meeting and she will think of her baby's sweet smell. She will have to use every ounce of discipline to keep from running home,
just to make sure her baby is all right.

I want my daughter to know that every day decisions will no longer be routine. That a five year old boy's desire to go to the men's room rather than the women's at McDonald's will become a major dilemma. That right there, in the midst of clattering trays and screaming children, issues of independence and gender identity will be weighed against the prospect that a child molester may be lurking in that restroom. However decisive she may be at the office, she will second-guess herself constantly as a mother.

Looking at my attractive daughter, I want to assure her that eventually she will shed the pounds of pregnancy, but she will never feel the same about herself. That her life, now so important, will be of less value to her once she has a cchil. That she would give herself up in a moment to save her offspring, but will also begin to hope for more years, not to accomplish
her own dreams, but to watch her child accomplish his or hers.

I want her to know that a Cecaesareanarhiny stretch marks will become badges of honor.

My daughter's relationship with her husband will change, but not in the way she thinks. I wish she could understand how much more you can love a man who is careful to powder the baby or who never hesitates to play with his child. I think she should know that she will fall in love with him again for reasons she would not now find very romantic.

I wish my daughter could sense the bond she will feel with women throughout history who have tried to stop war, prejudice, and drunk driving.

I want to describe to my daughter the exhilaration of seeing your child learn to ride a bike.

I want to capture for her the belly laugh of a baby who is touching the soft fur of a dog or cat for the first time.

I want her to taste the joy that is so real it actually hurts.

My daughter's quizzical look makes me realize that tears have formed in my
eyes.

"You'll never regret it," I finally say. Then I reached across the table, squeezed my daughter's hand and offered a silent prayer for her, and for me, and for all the mere mortal women who stumble their way into this most wonderful of callings.

Just in last two weeks, January 18, 2008

Before being a mother, I always thought that parents should be all happy to see their children growing up, but ....

In the last two weeks, my boys moved out of their cribs and also no bottles any more for them. Of course, these were our decisions but still, we thought they were ready for moving to the next steps, because they are not babies any more.

Today I wanted to take my boys to children museum of Salem. I couldn't find a parking spot close enough to the museum and had to walk a little. I thought to not take the stroller and let my boys walk with me. I was holding their little hands which were warmer than mine and walked all the way from where i parked my car to the museum. When I was crossing street with them I was thinking Oh, my God ! these are my little boys walking with me, passing all the ice and puddles with me

Yes, I can never hold my sons like how I used to when they were little babies, but it doesn't mean that I am not going to enjoy every stage that they are growing into

Meeting Daddy Jerry and Mom Garnett for the first time, January 13, 2008

We had a wonderful time with Michael's father and his wife. They both are really warm and loving people and lots of love for our sons. Relic and River both enjoyed playing with grandpa and listening to Mimi reading stories to them. They also enjoyed playing with her walker ! What a great toy for them ! And Mimi was a typical grandmother who was spoiling River and Relic with gifts and candies and giving them ride with her walker.

I do feel happy and proud to have such a wonderful people as my relatives

Entry for January 06, 2008

Last night, we put the boys in their actual bed. Maybe not, because they both slept in one bed. We thought it was a little early to trust them for sleeping in the top bed of their bunk bed.

My boys are growing up faster than I want.... We put the cribs away to give them to a friend who just gave birth to her second child.

Entry for January 01, 2008